Contents

Introduction Book? What Book?

1 How Weird Am I, Anyway? 2 There Goes the Neighborhood 3 An Alternative to College 4 Are We Having a Good Time Yet? 5 The Log Cabin 6 Send In the Clowns 7 Drool, Britannia 8 All About Music 9 A Chapter for My Dad 10 The One You've Been Waiting For 11 Sticks & Stones 12 America Drinks and Goes Marching 13 All About Schmucks 14 Marriage (as a Dada Concept) 15 "Porn Wars" 16 Church and State 17 Practical Conservatism 18 Failure 19 The Last Word